Uncle John Settles In

Uncle John Settles In

It's surprising how quickly you can get used to having someone staying with you; Uncle John proved to be a very easy-going guest, and just as I remembered him to be in East Africa. Within a few days, we had settled into a really nice routine. It was a bonus that he really liked my cooking.

Right at the start, he said, "I will eat pretty much anything, but I'm not very keen on spaghetti. I will eat it if I have to, but I don't like it much."

I assured him he wouldn't get spaghetti from me; and for the whole month he was with us, he ate everything I put in front of him. Having some good home cooking meant he filled out, and looked 10 years younger.

Happily, he was also completely unfazed by being on what we (still) laughingly call "Alex Time."

I've worked on stage for so many years, and the cardinal sin of the theatre is to be late for a show, so I am always punctual for performances and appointments, but some things - like deciding when to go shopping - can be called "flexible," and end up on "Alex Time."

Being on "Alex Time" often means I have been distracted by something - maybe writing a piece to deadline, that perhaps I had truly believed would only take me 10 minutes to do, but by becoming so engrossed, meant thirty minutes passed by in what felt were only as many seconds!

I know "Alex Time" is a very annoying habit. It starts off with me saying something along the lines of, "O.k., I'll just get the vegetables prepared for dinner, and then we'll go shopping. We'll go in half an hour."  (Uncle John loved coming shopping with me; he would push the trolley round Tesco, racing up and down the aisles like a rocket, and generally being a marvellous help in getting everything done).

Whilst he waited for me, he would read the paper until the half hour was up, and then start wondering: where is Alex?

In the meantime, until the moment I had finished was I was doing, I had probably become blissfully oblivious of the time. I would then realise I was adrift by over an hour and tear back downstairs, feeling awful for keeping Uncle John waiting. In contrast, he was completely sanguine about it. He kept saying it was just so nice to be with us, and be part of the family, and he was happy to sit in the lounge or the garden and read, or fuss the cats.

He loves cats, but wasn't allowed a pet in the unit where he lived, so it was a treat to have an affectionate cat or two around the place. That was one really good subject that both he and Mum agreed on.

There were lots of other issues on which they clashed. When they got talking, and started to reminisce about the past, there were many things about which Mum was at loggerheads with Uncle John. It was a relief when he steered conversation back to the cats.